Not all of the dirt that just came off of the 4 wheel drive, that had been out mudding and drove through the wash in front of you ends up down the drain. You cannot dictate what goes on in front of you. Invariably some of that dirt will be dragged across your finish. Those marks will be in your finish even after one wash. I wish it weren't so but it is.
I'm not simply arguing here. I think most people can reason their way through this. It most often comes down to a matter of just how much one will tolerate before they say, "Hey this isn't good." My experience is simply that people see clean, dressed protected, and spot-free very differently. I think it's great you take enough pride in your vehicle to clean it frequently.
Many people will recognize the name Mike Phillips of Meguiars, PBMG and now of 3D. When talking about car chemicals and tools he used to say, "Find something that you like and use it often." I'm pretty sure that he wouldn't mind that statement being expanded to include "Find something that works for you and do it often."